AN ABYSS OF SILENCE
Losing a loved one, whether human or “furry”, the devastation and grief takes the same toll. . . you seem to fall into an abyss of sadness, sometimes despair and disbelief, and always excruciating pain. Climbing out is not an easy task . . . my mom’s death in 2008 was the greatest loss, and every best friend that has gone to the “bridge” has made me relive the pain. Those of you who follow my blog about the dogs, understand how my work and life is tied to them on a spiritual level. Losing Lucia has literally knocked the wind out of my sails . . . I can hardly stand to put one foot in front of the other.
Yesterday, June 10, 2017, was the first full day without Lucia on this plane of existence. There is so much that I want to say about how special our relationship was . . . but that will come later. I became concerned that the others were grieving her and picking up on my sadness, so instead of rushing to do chores, I took the time to have them all in the big play yard, while I sat in a chair in the sunshine and gentle breeze and watched them romp and play, and always running back to check on me.
Not everything I write gets posted on my blog . . . I have a beautiful journal that I use for my private thoughts. I pulled it out yesterday because I felt that my thoughts about Lucia needed to be there.
As I paged through it, I realized that the last entry was dated Dec. 30, 2009 . . . It was the first anniversary of my mom’s death, and I had lost Nicky only 3 months earlier.
But what struck me as most amazing was that the last word of the last entry was, “Lucia.” I don’t believe in coincidences . . I had been getting messages from her all day . . . and to me, this was a validation..
A life is a life, regardless of species . . . it’s energy that is only transmuted and not destroyed. A soul is a soul . . . our best friends send us messages “from the other side” all the time, and actually, dogs are much better at it than humans. The connection does not end.
I want to share this message from a dear friend, whose love and wisdom I cherish. It was these words that she spoke to me yesterday that helped me take the first step out of that dismal abyss . . .
” It takes a great deal of courage and a world of heart to love a being that we know going in will probably not outlive us. Yet, to miss this glorious time would be much more of a tragedy”
Yes, love takes courage. And it takes just as much courage to believe what is in your heart, to not doubt those “special messages”, and continue to believe what you cannot see or maybe understand.